Shinn the Writer

A Shinn by Any Other Name

​

I’d been hearing about it for some time. Our old driver’s licenses were no longer going to be valid. We would all have to get what were being called “Real IDs.” The implication here seemed to be that any other form of ID was to be considered fake. I guess like the Trumpian “Fake News.” I really don’t know what was wrong with the old ones, but now we were told we needed new ones.

 

I mumbled and grumbled and figured that I’d put off updating my ID as long as I could, which was pretty long. The powers that be saw fit to give geezers like me a long time to adjust to something new like this. Still, late last year I began thinking I needed to get the job done. I kept hearing about maybe not being able to fly outside the U.S. or even being able to cross the border into Canada. And with things progressing (regressing?) as they were, I began to worry that my travel options might become limited.

 

First, research. I quickly found that it was the DMV that issued these new documents. They would be asking which documents I had for identification. I knew I had it somewhere, but I couldn’t find my birth certificate. Could be a problem. But I noticed on my passport, my name was listed as “John Graham Shinnick”. I knew that on my birth certificate I was John Graham Shinnick II. The first, of course, was my uncle for whom I was named. I had been called “Graham” for the first several years of my life and hated it. Being called “Graham Cracker” gets really old really fast when you’re a kid trying to fit in. It was my uncle’s wife who insisted that since her husband was called Graham, I should be too. I found out recently from one of his daughters that he didn’t like being called Graham for the same reason!

 

But now the emphasis was on the other link my name had to his, the “II” which differentiated us. I didn’t really mind the II. It was a bit hoity-toity for my tastes, but lots of people have such a suffix. My brother is a III. The last of the French kings was Louis XVIII. But that’s another story. I called the DMV to ask about how I needed to resolve this issue. The woman on the phone told me something I thought very strange, but I heard it several times going through the process. The preferred ID for this process was not one’s birth certificate, nor the driver’s license (which in my case also has no II) but one’s passport. Glad I’d renewed mine, though of the three I would have guessed that it would have come in third place.

 

But I had it handy and I would need to find my birth certificate later. Or maybe not. I haven’t used it in ages. So, I put it with the other documents needed to establish my residence, a bank statement and a utility bill. After working for a utility for 25 years, I figured it was time for a return on the investment, so I used a PG&E bill! I was ready, so I scheduled an appointment to do battle with the DMV, everyone’s favorite pastime. I was set for January 7.